Thursday, April 20, 2006:
ahh. dilemma bilemma. bleagurrhhhhh. i cant fill up my application form becos i dont know what to write. its like i wanna write to impress yet at the same time be humble. HOW ON EARTH DO I DO THAT. i want them to think i'm witty, smart, intelligent, good at math, interested in econs, have a future as an accountant so that my chances of getting the scholarship (or even be shortlisted for the interview if possible) will be bigger, BUT I CANT THINK OF ANYTHING TO WRITE! gah.
oh well. so now i'm letting my brain take a break from thinking too much about the scholarship.
anyway. went to acjc to watch the rugby/footie match. it was quite funny cos i didnt know what the game was about and the rules of the game and how you play it and the tactics and stuff. i just watched. it was amusing how all these guys just ran after this odd shaped ball and got dirty in clay-ey mud.. it was ultimately gross. but it was fun. and boy were there heaps of people at the stand. i just miss the ac/mg school spirit. i guess thats whats so different between st marys and ac/mg. but in a way i guess i'm not really letting go and giving st marys a chance. same for church. sigh. i guess i should open myself to perth instead of holding it all up inside. so much for letting God work in me. sometimes i get so confused and wonder whats wrong with me. i'm so blessed already. i've got everything i want. everything i could ever ask for. sigh. and yet i ask God for so much more instead of being content and letting God use me instead. sometimes all i just need is to let go of my pride and exchange it for humility. but each time i try, its just too hard. maybe i cant even call it trying. cos i dont even want to try sometimes. sigh. this is hard alright.
anyway. i digress.
but i cant bother commenting on the game. maybe tmr.
cell tmr. maybe i'll get some answers. too much on my mind.
a shout of praise.
11:30 PM
